I'm a big fan of questionable conversation inserts. I use them all the time. It's something that is said that is almost not meant to be heard. It's just weird enough to cause people to do a mental double take. Here is an example.
Someone says this,
Someone - Oh man, yeah, you'd do that and end up arrested.
Me – Uh, I can't have that again.
Someone - ...I just felt really uncomfortable you know?
Me – Yeah, like that time I got caught being to close to the school...
Someone – Ok, I'm going to go see Allen now.
Me – Don't tell him you saw me
Someone – I just picked up the new Bon Jovi CD
Me – I'm not allowed to...courts order.
On another note. I attended the annual “Open House” at my kids school. My brother in law and I have kids in the same class. While we were in the classroom we were instructed to take one of the supplied sheets of paper and write a little note to our child. It should be something nice the teacher said. “Your doing great, keep up the good work” etc. The words of wisdom would be read to them in class. Our minds went straight to these kinds of statements. Keep in mind the kids are 5.
“Yeah, well, you let me down again. Thanks...”
“I shouldn't expect much from you...”
“Your not trying hard enough...”
The caper I thought was this.
We are horrible dads.