Friday, July 28, 2006

Fake news by Chad # 7 (interview transcript)

I guess its important to believe the interviewer is from the UK.

We are joined today by Author Chad Nule. Chad is the author of the best selling book, “Henry Porter : The Boring American Kid” The story is set in the mid-west, Kansas to be exact, where the hero of the story, Henry, lives. Chad, Tell us a little about Henry.

Chad – Well, Henry's a good kid. He does fine in school but doesn't exceed in anything much. He has parents who love him and a decent aunt and uncle. He has a friend who lives next door and nobody really dislikes him. He collects baseball cards and plays Nintendo. He's goes to a public school and wears average clothes.

Is he magic?

Chad – No. If he was magic I would have told you that wouldn't I? It would seem like a pretty big attribute to skip over...

Well, with a name like “Henry Porter” I would have expected at least some connection to the similarly named best seller from the UK who we all have fallen deeply in love with.

Chad – Well, that's where you'd be wrong now isn't it? His name is Henry Porter. He doesn't wear glasses and he doesn't have an owl. He's a regular damn American kid. See, those Brits maybe unhappy with their own lives and feel the need to make up stuff like that but we don't.

So then, Henry Porter has no magical ability.

Chad – No. That's what I said, he doesn't have any magic. Henry plays video games and collects baseball cards. He's a regular kid, that's why people are buying the books. Henry will probably grow up into a fine man with a family and he'll work a half decent job at a paper distributing company. There's nothing wrong with that. No evil magician will be killing off the main character.

So there is an evil magician in the book?

Chad – No, not at all. The only evil in the book is that I don't get paid to do stupid interviews.

Tell me about the other characters in the book.

Chad – Well, Harry's best friend is named Mike.

And the girl?

Chad – There really isn't a girl. Oh, I see, your expecting a Hermione

So there is a Hermione!

Chad – NO! This is over. I'm not selling my book to you people. If you can't accept a book about reality than I have no desire to sell it to you.

Reality televison?

Chad - This is crazy.

Chad's book is available at bookstores across America. It is not however available yet in the UK.

No comments: