Tuesday, September 19, 2006

The one where Todd rapes the Parker Brothers

Isn't the game SORRY just PARCHEESI with a different name? I'm sure they would have tried to market it as PARCHEESI but the title was too ethnic for the American consumers and of course they would have had to pay for the rights. So the Parkers change the look slightly, and change the name, but it’s the SAME game. Meanwhile, some Pakistani entrepenuer with hopes of marketing this game from his homeland and maybe making it big in the land of opportunity, gets crushed by the corporate fat cats! What about paying me for the rights guys? SORRY buddy, we decided to put out a different game called, well, Sorry. And the poor guy goes belly up. But what does old Mr. Money bags care; as long as he has his plush hotel penthouse overlooking the Boardwalk.
Oh, don't get me started on MONOPOLY. Picture this: you’re a kid growing up, you’re not rich by any means. You have your own room, and that’s all you really want out of life. Now the landlord comes home one day all excited because his wife just won a bundle in a beauty contest enough to put a down payment on his dream: a hotel on his modest Virginia Ave. property. And out of the blue BAM! He raises your rent, Dad’s in jail, he can’t get out for a while, no help there. Your single mom can’t afford the higher rent, she’s a receptionist at the Marvin Gardens office building a few blocks away. It doesn’t pay squat! She doesn’t even have a car. So now, you gotta go live on Baltic Ave. on the other side of the tracks. You’ll never have the same opportunities there; the best you’ll probably ever manage is maybe get a life-sucking job at the water works.

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